Sunday, January 24, 2016

Once Upon A Time In A Sex Toy Store

The most embarrassing day of my life started at Walmart.  I'm sure I'm not the first person to use the words Walmart and embarrassing in the same sentence. It's a place where everything goes and anything can happen. However, on this particular day, Walmart would not be the setting of, but the setup for my most embarrassing day ever.

I had been browsing the aisles for beer, frozen pizza and other miscellaneous food items that required little to no effort to prepare, when a cute, lacey, hot pink bra caught my eye across the way. It didn't have any matching panties with it but, it was cheap and I reasoned I could find some panties somewhere else to go with it. I tossed it in the basket. Score!

On the way home, I realized I would pass right by the stripper store. That's what my girlfriends and I call it anyway. You know, those places with names like Cindy's or Christie's or Crystal's. They are touted as adult gift stores. You can find lingerie, bachelorette party gifts, and of course...lots of sex toys. I whipped into the strip center parking lot and found a spot right up front. There was a good chance they would have some panties to go with my new bra.
I quickly strode up to the door and gave it a swift pull. Before I could open it more than a foot, I was smacked in the face by a strong smoke odor. I had accidentally opened the door to the business next door, a smoke shop. I hastily walked the few steps to the correct store entrance and went in.

I browsed the lingerie area but didn't really see what I was looking for. I spent a few minutes wandering around the store taking in all of the sights and novelties. I was staring at a wall display of nipple clamps and other various items when I heard the front door bell go off in the store, indicating a customer had come in. I looked over and immediately froze. My father-in-law had just walked in. My very conservative, banker father-in-law.
My mind began reeling. Had I just busted him? I know he wasn't there shopping for my mother in law. I was half expecting a  hooker to come strolling in behind him. I didn't know what to think. I didn't know what to do either. I went into full panic mode. I turned around, took two steps toward a table of products to hide behind and did a duck and cover move that would have made my elementary school teachers proud. It wasn't until I was squatted down that I realized I was hiding behind a display of penis pumps. Awesome. That didn't matter now though. I had to figure out how I was going to sneak out unseen.
That's when I heard the familiar voice. "Where did she go?" Shit! I'm the one who was busted! My cover was blown. I slowly stood up like a Viet Cong soldier rising up from the jungle, surrendering to the enemy. "Heeyy", I slowly said in an awkward way.  "What are you doing here", I asked as I was bringing my arms down from the top of my head.
He cocked his head sideways and said, "You didn't see me?" "No", I replied with  what must have been a very confused look on my face. At that moment, I remembered that he smoked cigars.  He must have seen me at the smoke shop next door. A feeling of relief came over me when I realized that he wasn't there to shop for himself. But, that feeling quickly turned to what can best be described as amusing horror.

There I was, staring at my father-in-law while surrounded by dildos, butt plugs, and crotchless panties. Nothing weird about that right? Wrong! There is everything weird about that. I don't remember the exact words that came out of my mouth but it was something to the effect of, "Ok. Funny. You can leave now.", all while I'm almost pushing him towards the door.

He finally left. I stood there trying to wrap my head around what had just happened. I heard one of the sales clerks  say, "I take it you knew each other." I turned around to look at her, hands to my face, shaking my head back and forth and told her, "That was my father-in-law and I am so embarrassed." Her coworker quickly chimed in, "Well, at least you didn't have a big dildo in your hand when he walked in." The other retorted back, "Even if you did, you should have asked him if he thought his son might like it." What! I decided my spur of the moment shopping trip was over.

The incident has never been mentioned again. Moral of this story...don't buy a bra from Walmart.

Lisa J is a teacher and blogger in Fort Worth, Texas. 

Saturday, January 23, 2016

Let Me Tell You How I Really Feel

AMAZING!  Seriously! Those of you who keep up with me on Facebook know that I decided to become a Beachbody Coach a little over a month ago.  THIS is why I feel amazing!  

Let me explain... when I first started this journey it was about me.  I signed up to be a part of a challenge group.  I wanted and needed to change up my workout regimen.  After seeing the results, I was kind of hooked!  But real talk, it is about so much more now.

I think there are 2 reasons why I have always been into working out.  One, I was always a competitive athlete.  I played several sports and by the time I got to high school was playing volleyball year round.  This also led to my addiction to running.  
The second reason isn't as pretty.  When I was in elementary school, I was a tad overweight.  Ok, maybe more than a tad.  I can still fit into my 4th grade cheerleading uniform and I have grown about 8 inches at least.  Have I mentioned that I am 39?  And that I can fit into my 4th grade cheer uniform?!  What?!?!    

People always say to me that they don't believe that I was ever overweight.  Unfortunately, there are some scary pictures that prove it but refuse to share more because of the awful 80's girl mullet that I was rockin' on top of my stocky self.  I'm sure you can picture it just fine.

This second reason is also one of the reasons I wanted to be a coach when I began my teaching career.  I felt like I could relate to almost all the girls whether it be because of weight or just self confidence.  You see, I really didn't get self confidence until oh, about 3 months ago.  Although I had plenty of friends and even boyfriends (whatever that meant in elementary school), I still had boys make fun of me for my weight.  That is something that doesn't just go away.  Even after I had decided that I was going to change my eating and go on a diet before entering junior high, the damage had been done.  Because of those comments, I've constantly struggled with self confidence.  
The world can be a very cruel place but, what I've learned most in these past few months, is how beautiful it can be as well.

I've always appreciated the beauty of nature and God's creations.  Unfortunately, that didn't seem to roll over into my own self worth.  As I watched my body change doing the 21 day fix extreme, I found some amazing women along the way.  Between the changes that my body has made both internally and externally (seriously, I have more muscle tone now than I did when I was super skinny in high school!), I have found some of that self confidence that I was lacking.  I've heard every excuse in the book as to why people won't make changes in their eating or workout habits, even before becoming a Beachbody coach.  I myself, was guilty of these at times.  But, how I feel now makes me throw every one of those excuses out the door!  
I'm sure people get annoyed with all my FB posts about what all I am doing but here's the thing, I can't help but share how I feel because I want others to have the same opportunity!   I have tried really hard to be more purposeful and active in my scripture reading as well.  It's crazy to me how much more meaningful it has become to me now that I have this renewed self confidence.  I'm not saying I don't or won't ever struggle.  That's not realistic.  But, I can't deny that these few changes I have made, have made me a better mom, wife, and definitely more loving of myself.   You deserve it too!

Traci Eller Mabry is a teacher and fitness coach. She lives in Montgomery, Texas with her husband and two daughters. You can find out more about Traci at https://www.facebook.com/coachtmabry/

Let Me Tell You How I Really Feel was originally published at http://traci-alittlebitofnothing.weebly.com/blog/so-let-me-tell-you-how-i-really-feel on July 2015.

Less Is More

Like many teenage girls, when I entered the seventh grade,junior high, I was allowed to wear makeup.  Boy, did I wear it. Lots of it. My friends and I were striving to look like Kathy Ireland, Cindy Crawford, and all of the beauties whose images we saw gracing magazine covers and television screens. More than that, I wanted to be them. I wanted to be beautiful. I wanted boys to like me. I wanted to ensure I had a date to prom, even though that was five years away. It was never too early to start looking for a prom date, I reasoned in my thirteen year old mind.
I curled my hair and sprayed on shellac to keep it in place. I fixed my face everyday. I carefully applied powder, blush, eyeshadow, mascara, and lipstick. I could never quite master liquid foundation and chose to go without. A close friend slathered on the foundation so thick, it looked strange. She became known as "base face" to people at school. This didn't seem like an ideal way to get a prom date, so I avoided it. 

By the ninth grade, my last year of junior high, applying makeup and doing my hair seemed more like a chore than something I wanted to do. I regularly burned my scalp with my hot iron. My face would break out from the makeup and I couldn't seem to stop having an itching feeling on my face while it was applied. I was sure the constant tugging on my face was going to give me premature wrinkles. And most importantly, I hadn't gotten a single date. I slowly started to ween myself from these beauty products. First it was the eye shadow. The blush soon followed. By the time I entered high school I was only wearing a little mascara and some lipgloss. I began wearing my hair long and straight.

Had I become an ogre not fit for public eyes? No. The first time I felt good about my decision to kick my makeup habit came while at a friends house. She and I had plans to see a movie. I arrived at her house and she was getting ready. I took my usual position sitting on the edge of the bathtub, while watching her primp. It took two full hours for her to do her hair and makeup. It had taken me about ten minutes. I felt like those two hours were such a waste of my time. But the lightening bolt hit when she, out of nowhere, said, "I'm envious of you." What!? Me I thought. Why on earth would anyone be envious of me? She was pretty, popular, and had a boyfriend. She continued, "You don't feel the need to do all of this and you are totally confident with yourself. You're beautiful." I had never felt so empowered. I realized suddenly that she was choosing to enslave herself to this ritual in order to become someone she really wasn't. I felt sad for her because she felt she wasn't good enough without it.
Eventually, I stopped wearing any makeup except for a little lipgloss or Chapstick. And, I even scored a date for the prom. Actually, I had scored a boyfriend, who was in the grade above me and very good looking. We dated for four years. Later, when I went off to college, not wearing makeup seemed to work in my favor. I often heard from guys that they liked my natural look, and how much they hated makeup. "What were women trying to hide under all of that stuff", they would ask. 

One Christmas break, I got a job at JCPenney. During orientation, my boss informed me that they were going to place me in the cosmetics department. I politely asked if I would have to wear makeup for that position. She said, "Of course, you will need to use the products to sell them." I informed her that I didn't wear makeup. I still remember the confused look on her face. She then asked me why I didn't wear any. I thoughtfully answered, "Makeup is used to hide imperfections, wrinkles. It's meant for lips and cheeks that have lost their natural color. I'm nineteen years old and have plenty of color in my lips and cheeks and I don't have one wrinkle. Maybe when I'm older I'll find it appropriate." She couldn't argue and assigned me to the Young Men's department instead. I loved it. I got asked out on more than one date while working there.
As much as I'd like to have stayed nineteen forever, I did get older. Much older. That job at JCPenney was twenty one years ago. Do I wear makeup today? No. Yet somehow, I still managed to snag an eligible handsome man that would become my husband. I've learned that a person doesn't have to hide what they look like to find someone to love them. I look back over the many years that have passed and feel sorry for my friends who have wasted countless hours of their lives and spent countless dollars making themselves pretty with makeup, when they were always pretty without it. Like Julia Ormond said in Sabrina, "More isn't always better, it's just more."

Lisa Eller Jobe is a teacher and blogger in Fort Worth, Texas

Friday, January 22, 2016

Atheism in the Bible Belt:Coming Out of the Religious Closet

My first memories of church occurred when I was about three or four years old. I was with my great grandparents and my most vivid memory is not of the beautiful sanctuary, but of the ladies restroom. My family was raised Catholic. My great grandparents, grandparents, and my father all attended Catholic schools. My grandparents went to church every Sunday no matter what. They were very devout. However, my father never went. And my mother refused to let them baptize me as a baby into the Catholic Church. She thought that should be my decision. 
My next memories of religion occurred in elementary school. I was very close to my cousin and often stayed overnight with my aunt and uncle. They were Baptist. On several occasions I attended church with them. My cousin and I attended Sunday school and learned bible stories. I remember learning about Noah and his ark and about Jonah having been swallowed by a whale. I remember distinctly rationalizing that these stories were just that...stories. They didn't sound like anything plausibly real and my young mind dismissed them as such. I liked reading the stories and coloring pictures they gave me, but I wasn't quite old enough to grasp the concept that others believed these stories to be in fact real.
My next Sunday school school experience came around the age of twelve or thirteen. My best friend attended the same Catholic Church as my family did and I was invited to accompany her to church a few times and Sunday school classes. In church, when it was time to receive communion, her mother had asked if I had been baptized there. I'll never forget her reaction when I answered that I had never been baptized anywhere. Things suddenly changed. I wasn't allowed to receive communion with everyone else. I was made to feel that something was wrong that needed to be fixed. She couldn't believe my Catholic family had failed to baptize me. I was told I would need to be baptized to get into heaven. Wait....what? Some old man had to dunk me into water in front of a bunch of people in order for me to go to heaven. I couldn't believe what I had heard. It was unfathomable to me that an all loving Jesus Christ would allow me to burn in hell, even if I was a good person, simply because I didn't have some water thrown on me. This was the beginning of years of confusion I felt within. 
I attended Sunday school with my friend a few times and became even more confused. We were taught about Jesus Christ and then allowed to discuss what we had learned with the teacher. I was shy and often didn't speak out in class. However, there was one boy in class that asked a lot of questions. He was skeptical of some of the things she was telling us and he questioned her about them. They were some of the same questions I had myself. She very quickly became noticeably flustered by his examination of the scripture. And I began to realize something too. She didn't have answers to the questions he asked. She would simply say, "That's when it all comes down to faith. You just have to have faith that Gods word is always right." Even as a young person, I thought this was odd. Why could she not answer some pretty straight forward questions? That young boy was eventually asked not to come back to Sunday school because he was causing problems.

Years later, when I was in high school, I started dating a really nice guy whose family also attended the same Catholic Church as my family. He had even attended the same Catholic school until the eighth grade. It worked out at first because religion didn't seem to be an overwhelming part of his life and he was ok with the fact that I had not been baptized. Once we started college, he met some evangelical Christians who held weekly bible study classes at each other's houses. We would sing and read scripture. I really tried to accept Jesus during this time because I really loved my boyfriend and wanted to be with him and I wanted to go to heaven. During these bible studies, guests would share what God had told them. I was so lost during this time because God had never told me anything. These people claimed that they would ask for Gods guidance and he would answer them and guide them. God never answered me or offered me any guidance. Was something wrong with me? Did God not think I was worthy of speaking to? I started not only to question myself but began to question if they were being truthful with themselves. They never could provide any proof that God had said anything to them. It was basically just their word and I should just have faith that God was talking to them.  
My relationship ended when my boyfriend spent every dime of his savings to buy bibles to give away. This was money he needed for other things like school and a car. If he was wanting to help people, I thought a better choice would have been to buy food and clothing for the needy, not a book. About this same time, he told me that he was going to be baptized again. I couldn't understand why. Did Jesus not think once was enough? On top of that, he was going to do it with several other friends from bible study in an apartment complex swimming pool...in the middle of winter! I finally said enough is enough. Blowing his savings and putting his health in danger in order to please a God who never bothered including me in his conversations was more than I could take. 

I live in the Bible Belt and nobody that I knew questioned the existence of God. It wasn't until the murder of Madeline Murray O'Hare that I had even heard of the word atheist. I was immediately intrigued that there was someone else that thought like I did. However, it was something that I kept to myself because people spoke hatefully about her and atheists. I was scared to express my true beliefs. After all, she had been murdered. 
During my last year of college, I took a class on World religions. I'll never forget the first time I read the Epic of Gilgamesh, a work of literature older than the bible. It unmistakenly contained stories that were extremely similar to the bible. We began to learn of other texts that contained other biblical stories. I was introduced to Gods who had lived long before Jesus Christ, yet contained strikingly similar bios. I realized the bible was simply a rehashing of much older stories that had been around long before. It was like a ton of bricks had been lifted from my shoulders. I no longer feared hell, I no longer yearned for heaven. I realized that this may be my one shot at existence and I should make it count. I felt a greater responsibility to be a good and loving person and to make the most of my life. I no longer felt threatened. I no longer felt afraid of death. It was a natural part of life that everyone would experience.

The rise of the Internet was responsible for my coming out of the closet as an atheist. In the last several years, I have found groups of atheists who can speak to each other about our disbelief and strengthen and perfect arguments that are often presented to us from believers. I have become much more knowledgeable about the bible and other religious scriptures and that has only cemented my atheism. You see, most atheists don't wake up one day and say "I reject God." It's a journey that all atheists have had, a process of discerning information we have received over our lifetimes and coming to a conclusion about it. Like Benjamin Franklin once said, "Once the mind has become enlightened, it cannot again become dark."

Lisa J is a teacher and blogger in Fort Worth, Texas

Thursday, January 21, 2016

10 Things Texans Miss Most When They Leave

      Sometimes we are pulled away by jobs or family. Sometimes we are pulled away by adventure. Whatever the reason for leaving, those who have had to move away from Texas often share in a longing for things that were commonplace back home. Those things that bond us together as Texans. Memories of Friday night football and chasing fireflies in the front yard. Memories of the cicadas making their loud musical sounds announcing that summer had indeed arrived. Sometimes the longing can be filled when we here that familiar "y'all". Sometimes the Cowboys game on television can bring back memories of Texas in the fall, and the crack of the baseball brings memories of summer nights. There are many traditions that bond all Texans to home. Here are ten things Texans miss most when they leave the Lonestar State.

10. Chips and Queso
Every Texan has probably made the mistake of ordering queso while at a Mexican restaurant not located in Texas. The offenders were probably met with stares of confusion. Maybe they were brought a cup of cold shredded cheddar. This has personally happened to me. Sometimes the odd request is just ignored and nothing is brought to the table at all. Queso, or "cheese" in Spanish, is smooth warm melted cheese served in a small bowl for dipping chips. It sometimes contains onions, peppers, or tomatoes. It is a comfort food staple for most Texans. This delicacy is served as an appetizer at most all Mexican restaurants south of the Red River and north of the Rio Grande.
9. Politeness
"Yes ma'am, No sir, Please, and Thank You" are ingrained in every Texan from birth.  We are taught to open the door for women and the elderly. Drivers wave to complete strangers while passing them on a lonely highway. Business deals are often sealed with a firm but friendly handshake. Visitors from out of state often comment on our polite behavior more than anything else. We just can't understand why the rest of the country doesn't follow suit in the manners department. 
8. Whataburger
Always voted the number one hamburger fast food joint in Texas. The first store opened in 1950 in Corpus Christi, Texas. They serve giant burgers made the way you like it. You can even request bacon, avocado, jalapeños, or A1 sauce to make your own custom burger. Their ketchup is sweet and unique. They sell it in stores and online. Open 24 hours, Whataburger has been a late night dining destination for decades. Breakfast is served from 11pm to 11am in addition to the regular menu. Whataburger is the ultimate late night destination for young party goers and bar hoppers.
7. Tex Mex
There are Mexican food restaurants located outside of Texas but they taste nothing like the Tex Mex served within the state borders. Tex Mex has a unique flavor all its own. It is a spicier, more dressed up version of the usually bland traditional Mexican cuisine. Let me compare a Florida enchilada to a Texas enchilada. In Florida, my chicken enchilada consisted of boiled chicken with the skins included, wrapped in a corn tortilla. That was it, just two ingredients and extremely bland. A Tex-Mex chicken enchilada contains boneless, skinless chicken breasts, boiled in a tomato, pepper and onion Rotelle sauce. We shred the chicken and roll it in a corn tortilla topped with a flavorful sour cream sauce or green tomatillo sauce. Sprinkle some shredded cheese on them for a grand finish. Tex-Mex is an explosion of flavors found nowhere else on earth.
6. Pick Up Trucks
Texans love their pick up trucks. And why wouldn't they? Gasoline is cheap in this energy abundant region. There are plenty of places to park them. What else could you haul around bales of hay in, pull trailers, and have tailgate parties with? They are often graced with gun racks or welding equipment, a necessity for hunters and oil field workers that are so abundant here. There are even Texas Editions of some popular trucks. Pick ups don't seem as practical in other places where space is limited. SMART cars are still considered a novelty here.
5. Wide Open Spaces
Texas is big. Really big. You could drive twelve hours straight in one direction and never leave the state. Everything is big in Texas because there is just so much room. Our speed limit reaches 85 in some parts of the state because, honestly, there's nothing around to hit. Anyone who has observed the Milky Way from a rural spot in Texas away from city lights knows it is almost a religious experience. Texas is large enough to have seven very distinct regions: Piney Woods of East Texas, the Gulf Coast, the Rio Grand Valley, Big Bend region, Staked Plains of the Panhandle, the Hill Country and the Grand Prairie region. When Texans speak of going on vacation, it is often to another part of the state. Texas is one of the few states where you can experience the beach, forests, deserts, flat prairies, rolling hills, mountains and canyons.
4. Shiner Bock
Unofficially, the state beer of Texas. Brewed in Shiner, Texas, this German and Czech beer has won over the hearts of most Texans. Although it's gaining popularity in other states, it is not available everywhere. For a displaced Texan, it's like home in a bottle. Starting out as a small independent brewery in 1909, it has grown into a major brand that has branched out with many new flavors including Texas Ruby Redbird and Prickly Pear. The brewery has operated continuously since its opening, even during years of prohibition. Once only accounting for 1% of all beer sold in Texas, it is now the fifth largest craft brewery in the United States. It's the perfect cold brew for the hot Texas summers.
3. Cowboy Hats and Boots
You don't have to be a cowboy to sport a cowboy hat and boots. In Texas, it's perfectly ok for the ladies to wear the combo with a skirt or dress for a night on the town. It's not unusual for business men to wear the same with their suit and tie. For some police officers, it's part of the uniform. There are summer hats and winter hats and an endless choice of boot styles. It's a right of passage for Texas children to have their photos taken in their tiny but adorable hats and boots, even if they never wear them otherwise. Some only dust off their duds for the annual stock shows or rodeos.  Some just wear them to their local honky tonk to strut around like roosters for the opposite sex. Unfortunately, this look can seem a little out of place if you're not in Texas itself.
2. Dr Pepper and Blue Bell Vanilla Ice Cream Floats
In Texas, all sodas are referred to as Coke. Dr Pepper is the preferred flavor. I personally refuse to eat at any establishment that offers Pepsi as a replacement. Pepsi is, well, a Yankee drink. Consider it blasphemy. I never understood the Pepsi challenge that threatened Coke in the 80's. We always knew that Dr Pepper was the best. It was even better served over a couple scoops of vanilla ice cream.
Blue Bell creameries have been in the news lately with their unfortunate Listeria outbreak. For Texans, this meant no ice cream until the problem was resolved and the plant reopened. We simply don't buy other brands of ice cream. Blue Bell has the unwavering support of all of Texans not just because they serve the best ice cream in the country but because they employ Texas families and contribute to our state income. 
1. Jobs and Affordable Cost of Living
Business is booming in Texas thanks in part to the oil and gas industry. Many businesses are moving here from out of state because of business friendly regulations. Texas charges no state income tax, reduces barriers to entry and creates a dynamic business climate ranked number five nationwide. New companies like Amazon and Toyota are moving here and bringing jobs with them. The Texas economy outpaces California and employs more minimum wage workers than any other state.
The cost of living in Texas is considerably lower than other parts of the country. You can get more bang for your buck here. Housing costs in Fort Worth, TX are a little more than 40% cheaper than Seattle or San Diego. Transportation costs are half of what those in Denver pay. Many families decide to move to Texas to give their children more opportunities. Places like California could offer their child a great view and weather but, Texas could offer a large house with a big yard. In Texas, they would have enough left over each month to pay for karate classes or summer camp. They could actually save for college. 

Lisa Eller Jobe is a teacher and blogger in Fort Worth, Texas.

Sunday, January 17, 2016

Keeping It Real About Teaching

Apparently my Facebook statuses have been less than positive. I have had more than one person say to me, "so, you are having a rough year (at school) this year." Um, the answer is yes, every year is hard but, it doesn't mean I don't care. It's actually the complete opposite. I apparently care too much.

Teaching has to be one of the most frustrating, exhausting, underappreciated, rewarding professions that there is. You can ask almost any teacher and they will tell you that apparently if you do your job well, you will inevitable get more work load, duties, and parent complaints (depending on the year). On the other hand, there are those teachers who just go through the motions and don't seem to have near the complaints, leave on time every day, don't ever get questioned, or if they do, it doesn't bother them. 
So I have to ask myself, "why am I doing this to myself?" Why do I drive myself to tears, anger, and I guess "venting" on social media? Despite how I have felt the last couple of years about the overall apathy and entitlement of the students, I have a tiny incling of hope that I will help them make better decisions and really learn to care. Of course the content of the class is important but, trying to get them to actually enjoy learning is so much more important. Much of the problem lies in testing and the constant professional development of how to teach or run your classroom better. Kids aren't even given much of an opportunity to enjoy learning because we are constantly on this outlined schedule of what all must be covered in too short of time. The result, kids hate school, teachers are exhausted, and everyone is grouchy (especially me, I'm sorry).
There are lots of problems in eduction. There are teachers who probably shouldn't be (maybe people are starting the feel this way about me). There are lots of parents who don't have a clue what teachers go through on a daily basis and want to blame the schools for the poor choices their kids make. There are coaches who say they support the teachers and what they are doing in the classroom yet really only care about their team winning. Don't get me wrong, I was an athlete and a coach and I'm super competitive; i.e, I am a really bad loser BUT, none of that matters if the education part is neglected. I have struggled with this immensely this year with one of those coaches.
Now let me address a little positive of what I enjoy doing as part of my job (insert, this is me personally, not all teachers feel this way). I love the relationships we get to form with our students and even some of the parents. I love that I have students that feel comfortable confiding in me and sometimes even listen to advice that I give. I love that I have the same students who come to my room in between classes and before and after school just to visit.

So the question becomes, are these few students mentioned above and the few "ah ha" moments in the classroom enough to keep putting myself through the "ringer" for really crappy pay? The answer: I don't know. Part of what I always question is, what else can I even do? If I'm not meant to be a teacher, then what? For now, I will pray that I get some kind of answer or strength to stay positive. I hate that I have made it sound like my job is awful, when what it really is, is just exhausting. I know the easy solution is to just stay off social media but sometimes that is my only outlet (my husband doesn't exactly understand some of my frustrations). I am, however, going to make a better effort to not be negative. I am going to look forward to finishing the last week of school and having a few weeks to try to renew my body and soul.
Traci Eller Mabry is a teacher and fitness coach. She lives in Montgomery, Texas with her husband and two daughters. You can find out more about Traci at https://www.facebook.com/coachtmabry/
Keeping It Real About Teaching was originally published at http://traci-alittlebitofnothing.weebly.com/blog/archives/05-2015 and has been published here with permission.

Saturday, January 16, 2016

That Time The Internet Almost Broke My Spirit

We've all seen them. They pop up in our newsfeeds daily. Our friends are doing them. Shouldn't we too? I'm talking about those quizzes that promise to tell us all something about ourselves. Who were you in a past life? What is your metal band name? What's your IQ? Who's your  doppelgänger? The list goes on and on.

I recently came across the site, howhot.io,  that promised to rate your age and looks using any picture you upload. It begs you to "Let Artificial Intelligence guess your attractiveness and age". It also guesses your gender.
#howhot


Ok. I by no means think I am any great beauty. However, I don't feel I'm a total dog. After trying out this new site, it's safe to say the Internet feels otherwise.

I started by uploading this picture of myself.

Not only did it rate me the lowest on looks, it said I was older than I actually am. Wow. Not quite what I expected. I reasoned that it must be the picture I'd chosen. So, I chose this one next.
Although I am younger in this one, I am still a dog. Then I tried this one. Maybe I would have better luck.
Still a dog but, hey, I'm getting younger.
Let's try another.
Well...I'm getting older again. At least I'm consistent in the ugly dog department. At this point I'm desperate to find just one photo that doesn't rate me a hmmm.
But, still no luck. Shall I keep trying? 
At this point, I feel I should win some sort of major award. You know, kind of like the leg lamp.

Like Biggie said, "And another one".

Oooh. I'm super young in this one...and still butt ugly.
I'm old again and the hideousness of my face continues to haunt the Internet.


If there is ever a police APB put out for me, it could read. Woman 23-43 with dog-like features.


And the truth just keeps coming.

Christmas can't help me now.

WAIT! OMG!
If you put me in a wedding dress...

I'm OK looking!....as a MAN. What?
Apparently, if you put a hat on me...

I'm an even better looking man. Lucky me. I decided to photoshop myself onto a "Sexiest Woman Alive" cover.

I'm a woman again, but even having a hot bod only got me an OK.
After having this website hit me with some hard realities, I decided to put in my husbands pic.

Looks like I married up. I wonder how I compare to some other people...


Gomer Pyle... Better looking than me.

Caitlyn Jenner...better looking than me.

Hitler...better looking than me.

Transvestite...better looking than me.

Random faces of meth chick...also better looking than me.

Steve Buscemi...better looking than me.

Charles Manson...better looking than all of us.

If you want to start your day feeling amazing about yourself, try out this new site. I'm sure you'll have better luck than I did.


Lisa J is a teacher and blogger in Fort Worth, Texas.